The End?

A frission of excitement ran through me as i saw her figure at the other end of the building and a million freaking scenarios flashed across my mind as i made my way to her. There i was tryin to give her a bouquet of flowers of which MAY be the last thing i'll do for her. Yes she did accept it the in end, amid much fanfare frm a group of minahs enjoying the "free show" and it somehow really gave me a peace of mind and made my day. All this was despite the strong objections raised by my friends as they didn't think it was the right thing to do at all. I concur, its not the right thing but its smt which i wanted and felt i had to do having ruminated for awhile.

I know im not exactly the epitome of the pukka "dear" but one things fer sure, i didnt't do nothing that would've hurt her intentionally and that i really tried to make things work. Having never cried(literally) for a girl, surely it meant smt for me to break that tradition. Am i a dullard to behave like i did? In the future i may look back at all this and have a laugh, but right now i cant help but not act according to whats expected of me frm my friends.

She herself asked me if all this is worth it. I can openly admit its not. But do i care? Course i dun, who cares if things are logical or not when you are experiencing such extremes of emotions? I think everyone should one way or another get hurt some time in their life by a relationship. Imagine having loved and been loved all your life without having get hurt, how boring is that man? *(i can hear some rebukes comin in already) Love by itself will only reach a certain level no matter how high that level, but with a tinge of "hurt", love can be even more treasured and special especially since you know how precious it is . Sure, theres a possibility that the tinge of "hurt" can turn you into a sceptic of love but what to do, i prefer to see it in an optimistic light. For now im still reeling frm that hurt and i dunnoe how things will turn out. I really hope i dun lose her though, i really really do cause i dunnoe what i'll do without her. *(ok some reprimanding comin my way soon)

This recent episode, i know has really surprised my friends as i'm the one that has always been strong emotionally and the one thats also dishing out the advice. I really can't say how sorry i'm to put them through this and most importantly i wanna say THANK YOU frm the bottom of my heart.